Conquering my fears is not something that normally I loose sleep over. However, for the past few weeks I have had this thought on my mind and I am not sure how to deal with it.
I have shared with with you all that we have a warm climate vacation planned for mid winter. We have started training and I know we will be physically ready to hike and try our hand at class III rock scrambling. Physically failing is not my issue, it’s mental. Ever since our last hike of the year at Devil’s Lake State Park here in WI where my family witnessed a gentleman fall from a bluff, I just can’t seem to forget that moment. And now, we are singed up to rock scramble with no ropes to the top of a mountain and I don’t know if my mind is going to allow this to happen.
I know my physical limitations and don’t usually push myself much further. Mentally is a whole different story. When we climbed Angel’s Landing in Utah, if I would have known what was ahead the entire hike up to the ridge, I know I would have had issues of panic. Thankfully, I did not know what was going to be asked of me and somehow I accomplished this. However, to this day I am still amazed with myself. I will admit, however, that I could have never accomplished this daring stunt without the support from our guides on this trip. I 100% trusted them with my life and that is not something I EVER do!
I already know that I will never forget what we witnessed here in WI and I know it will forever affect the way we hike at this park in the future. I always knew it could happen, I also know it could happen anywhere else we hike. It just scares me to know that even cautious, trained, physically fit individuals can make mistakes and one wrong move can forever change your life. I am not sure I am ready to risk this quite yet. I am not done living…. but at the same time, extreme activities are what make me feel alive. So what shall I do?
Do we cancel this hike/scramble and pick a different safer route?
Do we talk with our guide, explain our fear and see what he suggests?
Do I just suck it up and conquer my fear of falling?